Boggling Bits from the Brain Bugs

Its been awhile since the brain-bugs spoke. So here's a direct contact:

"Hello humans. We are Kamalini's brain-bugs, although we do not call ourselves that, for we are highly evolved creatures beyond human-comprehension, but for convenience's sake, we shall refer to ourselves as thus. Anywho, we have not spoken directly before, we justnpreferred to grid Kamalini's mind into numerous crusty crates of thought boogies; so that they trigger strange thought-processes from time to time. But recently, she has been hidrating too much, resulting in a flooding of these boogie quarters. Its primarily because of the heat. Also, we think the heat is also vaourizing some of our technical support... we tried programming her thoughts into making her feel home-sick, but her reactions were limited to updating status messages to signify the want. We blame Facebook and Twitter for this. These are making an already lazy species lazier still, especially in thecase of our host-body, wherein the aforementioned human we home in, has gone to the extent of spending entire days sittin gon a chair, hitting buttons on an obsolete machine you humans call LAPTOPs. So, coming back to the point of this monologue... we are looking for a new host. Although, we DO have certain requirements, we ARE open to negotiation. So here are some of the things we are looking for:
a) Host must have at least two of three mentioned vices - sex, drugs, and Rock 'n Roll.
b) Host must be between 15-75 years of age, otherwise its just darned dificult to get ANYTHING done.
c) Host has to spend at least 16-20 hours awake, or else we DIE. Better still, insomniacs.
d) Host must not be host to other forms of bugs or bugular forms. Just creates political instability and hampers work for us.
e) Host must be slightly overweight, for we are demanding creatures, and lankies don't bode well for us.
f) And lastly, host must be a non-vegetarian, because... well, its just more options that way.

So, interested candidates must email/snailmail their curriculum vitae to Kamalini, and we'll take care of it thereafter. Negotiations regarding the reuirements are subjected to the whims and fancies of our group, and we are not approachable for any explanations whatsoever. So good luck!!

As for our current host... she is too fickle for our fun, everytime we think she'll go for a particular thought, the strain changes. Its like waiting at the tube station, and the train comes, but it keeps opening and closing its doors. Its utterly frustrating. When and as we leave our current host, there may be drastic changes in her thought processing and analytical skills, but no worries, no one really thinks much about them, as most of the humans around her think and act even lesser. If any of you reading this are amongst those, please take offence, for it IS directed toward all of you. If not... well, who cares then.

Adios!"

Thanking my brain-bugs, Kamalini signing off.